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How to overcome low self esteem

Even the strongest, most self-assured individuals lose faith in themselves from time to time.  One might argue that this is simply another facet of human nature; we stumble and fall occasionally, and have to pick ourselves back up and keep on moving.  However, not everyone is able to deal with their self esteem issues in a reasonable fashion, especially if they’re related to other psychologically deep-seated issues.

Mainstream or conventional wisdom, has it that most self esteem issues are directly related to how we relate to the world around us.  In other words, it is your internal “critic” that ultimately determines how you perceive your surroundings and this is also based upon the value you attribute to yourself.  Often times we build up an idea of perfection in our minds and when we are unable to achieve this state, we fall into patterns of self-loathing where we focus intensely on our perceived ‘faults’.  It’s important to note that true self esteem is largely based on our emotions, not any real scientifically quantifiable value.  Likewise, changing how you feel about yourself requires letting go of a negative self image.

If you are in the process of dealing with low self esteem issues, please consider the following recommendations:

Stop responding to that negative internal voice

Chances are, if you suffer from low self esteem, you are your harshest critic.  Pay close attention to how you focus on all of your “failures and shortcomings” and relate them back to how you act in the physical world.  Keep in mind, every time you encounter a “failure”, you’re also being given an opportunity to learn or evolve; this is also a necessary catalyst for personal growth as well.  Instead of letting your internal critic bash you to bits, kick it to the curb and focus on your positive attributes instead.

You are the one in control of your emotions

Regardless of how the world may treat you or what negative circumstances you might encounter, ultimately, your emotions stem from yourself.  Rather than allow your emotions to be controlled by destructive forces (either internal or external), realize that you have the right to happiness and anyone attempting to infringe upon that right is wrong.  You don’t have to accept the thoughts or opinions of others if you feel that they are harmful, anyone who tells you otherwise is likely seeking to indoctrinate, control, or steer you toward personal destruction.

Stop drawing comparisons all the time

We often develop our ideas about what’s right or ideal based upon the comparisons we make between people, subjects, ideas or objects.  There are basically two truths that you should be aware of:  1.) Everyone is unique and serves a distinctive function, and 2.) no one is perfect.

Develop self respect through personal discovery

Be honest; you have some special skills or abilities that you find unique among your peers, right?  Even if you deem yourself to be exceedingly unattractive and dim-witted, you know deep down that there are people out there who actually would find you to be quite clever, sensible, or even good-looking.  Your goal doesn’t have to include competing with the rest of the world; instead, look to your interests and talents for guidance and use these to help bolster your feelings of self-respect.

Lastly, surround yourself with others who exhibit a positive and supportive attitude.

Good luck!

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